but I am freaking exhausted. I cannot wait for winter break to begin so I can try to replenish my batteries. This is a hard year teaching, and it is a struggle to go to work, and some days to face my meditative acts.
Last night, I was near tears with emotional/mental exhaustion and stumbled my way through the chaplet. It was a mess, and I ended up concluding with a heartfelt prayer to the Archangel Gabriel explaining my exhaustion. It was the toughest night so far, and I can only hope that this low will quickly be over.
Tonight’s sitting was much better, and I felt on firmer ground. I’ll just keep on showing up and doing my best.
#DoMagick is rolling along nicely. I am showing up daily to say the chaplets. It is a relaxing practice, even if I’m not always enthused about starting it. Work gets very chaotic before impending breaks, and my mental/social energy is usually drained by the time I get home. The last thing I want to do is reach out more, but sitting and reciting the chaplets is soothing.
This exercise is also thought provoking. I’m currently revisiting old spiritual stomping grounds, as it were, and sitting down to examine many things that have been long sitting in now Dusty boxes on the bookshelf of my mind.
I’ve completed a full week of Archangel chaplets, and began again today with the .
I still feel like I am in the ‘getting to know you’ phase of the work. It is making me think and reexamine things — which is never bad, and is a bit of a kick in the bum that I need to break out of some loops while laying down new tracks.
It could be an interesting winter. I’m not sure yet where I’ll be hashing all of these thoughts out; my journal is looking decidedly in need of retiring (I’m tired of looking at it, frankly, and don’t want to dip my toes into the energy pool around it) and I don’t just want to ramble here — even on a private page.
Worse case scenario, I will go to the stationary store and pick up a new notebook. I have a few sketchbooks that are developing nicely into art journals, and I am also writing the chaplets in them — but I think a decent spiral book might be what the spirit is leaning toward getting.
Sealtiel is today’s archangel. The meaning of the name is given as the “Prayer of God”.
Reciting the chaplet, it occurred to me that this is a prayer for us to be engaged, fully and bodily, with the Divine daily. That is a hard task in our world. There’s many distractions, many disappointments, and a lot of brutal drudgery for many people. I admit that there are days when I complain loudly and at length about my job, but am resolved to thinking about how I can make it prayer to connect with the Divine, or to at least know that the situation will pass and I will have endured. I’m sure that there will still be days when I complain, moan, groan, and ask “OMG! Why me?” but, I hope that I can remember to respond instead of react in those times. It might not be easy, I am incarnated as a human, after all, but it is good to know that there is a power out there that is wiling to help me out.
I am getting images of the Archangels and their chaplets added to my past #DoMagick posts today.
It is a beautiful snowy winter day. Our sweet little cat is home with us, resting and being coddled. He’s a trooper getting his liquid meds, but hates the pills. I haven’t looked at the bill yet — I’ll just keep enjoying the weather and the purrs for now before worrying about paying off the credit cards — but considering how much his scripts cost, the little fuzz-butt is swallowing those pills.
Archangel Sealtiel is today’s archangel and I will be posting my work later this afternoon.
#DoMagick accomplished. Today was St Barachiel. It was very soothing as we waited for the vet to call and okay our little lion’s release home. He is currently resting in a warm lap and enjoying being fussed over.
#DoMagick – Day 7 ~ Chaplet of St Jehudiel completed. Still up in he air about our Luke. His kidney numbers were still a bit high this morning, so I am getting caught up with household things that got overlooked the past 2 nights. Some baggage to unpack with Jehudiel’s chaplet, in terms of phrasing (heh, I hear that in Sterling Archer’s voice) that I will be examining more in-depth.
I’ve decided to cut myself some slack and post all the chaplets from these hectic days this Saturday. A full, free day with a cup of fresh coffee is the perfect time.
#DoMagick – Day 6 ~ Chaplet of St Raphael has also been done! I actually accomplished it whilst the sun was shining, then called the vet, and went to see Thor: Ragnarok with my children.
It’s very likely that tomorrow’s chaplet will be done without a post, as well, because if all goes well tonight, we can bring our little lion home tomorrow. It will be the third late night in a row, but for an excellent reason.
The chaplets will be posted, however, and I will be keeping my fingers crossed that there will not be any more posting delays. One can hope.
#DoMagick – Day 5 ~ Chaplet of St Uriel has been done! I’ve just finished and will post tomorrow. I had to complete this chaplet so late because my sweet cat needed emergency surgery (catheter) tonight for a blockage in his urinary tract.
Gabriel is today’s Archangel. The chaplet is much shorter than Michael’s, and because of that, I think that it was easier to reflect on the words more as I was reciting them. Thinking on it, there is a more gentle, inner feel to this chaplet, as befits this day being ruled by the Moon. Michael’s chaplet feels much more solar/action oriented, whilst Gabriel’s feels more lunar/reflective.
I found myself sitting after the chaplet was completed and thinking about making myself a vessel of Grace. Of course, this appeals to my love of the Eldar and all things Middle Earth. The Elves themselves, being filled with the Grace of the Valinor, as they were the first Children of Ilúvatar.
Yes, I do adore the creation story as told by the dear Professor in the Silmarillion, and have no trouble using it to frame my own cosmology.
Back to the chaplet. I found myself studying the words and thinking about how to make myself a vessel of grace. Of how I could find a way to live to my ideal in this world — and that is a hard thing, to respond to this world’s blatant materialist message (I’m looking at you Xmas in October!!) with grace intact.